I was at the grocery store the other evening. I decided to go to a different United than the one I have frequented for nearly 10 years because it's slightly closer to my apartment by about 30 seconds. I was almost immediately frustrated the moment I walked in. I would like to know how the powers that be in grocer chains decide what the layout will be for an individual store. To me it makes sense to build them them to have the exact same floorplan and stock arrangement. Now, I can understand the desire to cater to the neighborhood and the diversity therein, but is it too much to ask that the bittersweet chocolate always be directly across aisle from the cake mixes? Cannot the Mediterranean dried apricots be at the end of canned fruit and juice aisle in every store?
The thing that really struck me was the sign for Aisle 2: Religious Candles, Salsa, Mexican, Pasta, Spaghetti Sauce. Religious candles? I had to go check to make sure I wasn't hallucinating. Sure enough, at the end of Aisle 2A, just past the Mexican soda pop and across from the Noodle Roni was a collection of candles swathed in religious iconography. I didn't notice any saints for lost and confused grocery shoppers, one that might help me find the bittersweet chocolate.
Then I went to the one where I usually shop because at the very least I'll see that handsome management chap who I enjoy looking at. I was on a quest for mascarpone cheese to put in my tiramisu cake. I'd seen there before many times, but could I find it this trip? Nope. Not only that, I couldn't find any religious candles with patron saints to help me in my search. What is the deal, United people? It became a true quest as I sought out at the Wal-mart on West 82nd and Milwaukee, the Market Street on 82nd and Frankford and finally discovered my prize at the Original Market Street on 50th and Indiana. OK, so they cater to neighborhoods and all, but couldn't they make them the least bit familiar to the person who doesn't frequently shop there, but has to out of necessity. It's hard to get around in a strange place when you're far from home!
