Sunday, October 28, 2007

Things That Go Bump in the Night . . .

. . . or “clackety-clack” would be closer to the truth. That would be my brain. You’ve heard the term “one-track mind” and its reference to a person who has tunnel-vision, thinking of one thing only, unable to focus on anything else. I wonder what that’s like because I’m generally unable to focus on any one thing at all. My problem is I have a multi-track mind and only one train of thought. It sounds nice and compartmentalized, but my train likes to cover all the tracks . . . at once . . . and since no train can be on more than one track at a time—not even the one in my head—there’s a lot of track-jumping and derailment going on up there. Perhaps “CRASH! BOOM! SCREECH! BANG!” and all forms of onomatopoeia associated with a train-wreck would be absolutely accurate.

I can keep that train on the track during the day, when I’m working and have people depending on me. Well, most of the time. It’s at night when my mind races through every thought I’ve had that day that’s been waiting for that train, sweeping over me like a tidal wave, trying to make up for all the time spent running parallel but never intersecting and now that the day’s finally over can catch that train at the station and seizes upon the opportunity to drown it . . . hmmm . . . maybe I should have gone with the tsunami analogy. Anyway . . . I have a hard time finding rest at night and quieting my mind. All manner of thoughts rush through. On really tough nights, it feels like every thought I’ve EVER had returns for an encore. ~sigh~ Can you tell I’m writing this at night?

And now I’ve been tagged . . . ~double sigh~ . . . The only reason I’m writing this post is to buy myself some time as I complete “Family Tree Part 2” and because I didn’t get much sleep this last week, so it seemed inspired. Perhaps I’ll save some of these thoughts for the “random facts” in my “Tag” post. Who decided it was going to be 8 random facts anyway? Why not 5? Or 13? I could easily provide 80, but then no one would come back, knowing more than they’d ever wish to know about me. For now, I have a train to catch . . . or drive . . . something . . . whatever!!!

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I have been on that train before ... it's bad when you are rethinking every thought that you had that day. It's worse when they are guilt-ridden, self-destructive thoughts. I'm grateful those days are past for me and hope they never return. My solution ... some serenity from living a better life and a uvulopalatopharyngoplasty which helps me sleep like a baby. I've told you this before ... sleep study, I highly suggest it. Sleep tight.

Lisa said...

I bet there's not a Latin root for that word.

Anonymous said...

I don't think so, but I bet it keeps you up tonight ... :)

Anonymous said...

I have that train running through my head as well! Like P said when it's every bad, guilt-ridden, what-is-wrong-with-me thought it can make for long nights.

Don't you wish we just had a remote control for our brain? Change the channel to something more peaceful..or to static..get some "white noise" going on...there are lots of options there!

Hope you found some respite from the clacking.

Melinda said...

Oh the human mind...